It's a health 8:37am and all of about 6 minutes ago, the view from my window looked a little something like this... lovely.
Then without fail the Welsh heavens opened and down poured the rain. Luckily for me I was quick enough to grab my camera but even without it I don't mind so much I just can't describe the feeling I get when it rains. It gives me a nervous energy as if something exciting is just round the corner.
For me, I hope that's true. With a new year we're always looking for new beginnings and I'm right on that bandwagon!
But before I get carried away with excitement for the new year I just want to touch on one glaringly obvious question.
Where have I been? If you're already a frequent visitor to this little Internet space you'll be wondering why the blog's been so empty for the last few months (but if you're new a very big Hello from me!).
Well truth be told, I was going through a patch of self doubt and lost the motivation to blog. So many people say the key to blogging success is good content, and frequent and consistent posting. So since my trip to the states which you can find snippets of here, and here, I've posted a couple of times with some sort of "I'm back" statement. I think I did it for two reasons, in a hopes that I would find the spark again and overcome the anxiety but primarily I just couldn't shake the overwhelming sense that I was letting you down. I had a responsibility and duty to post regardless of how I felt or if I even wanted to do it.
But I've come to realise, in all things you can try to push yourself to do things and ignore the way you feel, but you'll never get the satisfaction or comforting you're looking for. So in the end I decided I wasn't going to beat myself up over it, I was just going to take a break.
And I wanted to give the same advice to any of you out there who just aren't in the right place to be doing this, or anything else right now. There's so much pressure out there to stick to the rules that define "successful" blogging, but I don't know if I completely agree with them.
I understand the importance of an audience, and so I can see why for many people increasing your subscribers, followers or page views is probably your priority. But I had to take a step back and ask myself did that even matter to me?
I didn't start blogging because I needed a big following, or any following for that matter. I was looking for a space. A place where I could explore myself, my thoughts, my trials and tribulations, and through that process hopefully grow as a person. The relationships I've made along the way, and the people I've spoken with have been an extremely special bonus, but it's not the reason I started all this.
I'm still very proud of everything I've achieved on my blog, through my blog, or in my day-to-day life as a result of this journey, but I'm not going to berate myself anymore if now is just not the right time.
If you too feel like sometimes you just don't have the time, energy, or strength to do it right now? I hope you can draw from my experience and remind yourself "so it's OK...I'll do something else". Your quality of life will be the most important thing you ever work on, and whatever life brings you that should always be your focus.
I'm really feeling like life is getting quickly back on track and as such I hope to start blogging frequently again, but if I don't...I know now that it's OK.
Thea is an Academic, a Crafter and a Musician from the West coast of Wales. She documents her trials and tribualtions as she wanders the maze of challenges that life presents, all while travelling the world and pursuing her dreams.